Still not omnipotent

It's always good to learn you're okay with eminent death. We had a not so intense thunder storm yesterday, just a little rain and wind and thunder. My daughter was taking a nap in her room and I was reading. At one point, I heard these strange rumblings that kept building on top of each other, it sounded like a series of explosions. We also live in a military town with several military bases nearby. It's not unusual to hear them testing bombs and such or having exercises and so hear moaning guns (my technical term) firing and such. Nearly every day C-130's or jets fly overhead. Sometimes, these C-130's fly low enough they sound as if they are about to crash into the house, and on occasion, we hear sonic booms from the jets. I can only remember 3 such sonic booms and every time I hear them I expect to see a mushroom cloud and a storm of fire and debris and heat rushing to consume me at any moment. You know, like those scenes from the movies where people are turned to ash in a moment. Anyway, I heard these strange rumblings and this was my thought process:
--Rumbling--:
"Is that thunder? I've never heard it sound like that before. It sounds really strange. Is it the base? It doesn't sound like the base and they don't usually explode things when it's raining. Hmmm, what is it?
--More rumbling--
Hmm, I wonder if the North Koreans have finally launched something and it actually hit us? Well, nothing I can do about it. If I die, I die.

Of all the times I worry about life, my husband and daughter...why is it that in a moment of thinking this could be the end of my life, I simply say, "oh, well, not much I can do about it." Why is it only in these extreme moments is it so easy for me to recognize my limitations and accept that something bigger than me is in control?